I have acquired a new keyboard: http://www.apple.com/keyboard/. It is sensuous, sleek and dangerously thin - like an anorexic supermodel. And whisper quiet, like an anorexic supermodel sitting a physics exam.
It's built by Apple, which will make my Macophile father cackle with triumphant glee, but the plain fact is: Apple has mastered the human-to-computer experience, and this is the tool I spend the majority of my day with. There is just that extra sparkle of pleasure with every keystroke, and it was a small $50 investment.
Some reviewers complained that it did not provide enough help getting to home row, but I think those reviewers must be hamfisted trolls: "URRRRHH! ME BASH KEYS GOOD." What do they want, an usher with a flashlight? If you know how to type, this keyboard is for you.
I considered an ergonomic option with the split keyboard, but I can't stand keyboards that take up desk space as measured in acreage. Look at this thing: it's a keyboard wrapped in an armchair:
One thing I did have to do, since I am using an Apple keyboard with a Windows machine, is re-map some keys. I switched the last four Function keys (not used in Windows) to a Num- Lock and some volume control with SharpKeys. (Kinda something you'd think would be built into the OS, wouldn't you?)
The WAF (Wife Acceptance Factor) is high because Rachelle can sleep free from the sound of a squirrel tap-dancing into the wee hours, which is how she described the tappa-tappa-tappa from my old keyboard. The squirrel now wears fuzzy buskins.
If you thought libraries were bad before, just wait. Now they lend video games: Greater Victoria Public Library is guilty guilty guilty.
That's right. You walk in looking to expand your horizons, self-educate, steep yourself in the accumulated lore of centuries, and you end up walking out with Lego Star Wars The Complete Saga.
The leering gargoyle pushers librarians at the desk don't help.
Is that a book cart full of Wii games? I innocently ask.
Yes, but they're not cataloged yet, responds the bespectacled book pimp, hoping to lure me into sin by not quite hiding the shameless display of naked neatly stacked video game boxes.
Oh, I nonchalantly drool. I walk around the corner and lean my head against the dependable very non-sexy Encyclopaedia Britannica M-P, breathing hard for a while. I am a weak vessel, Lord.
